Legacy

It's finally turned winter in the city. I'm learning to appreciate the cold, as it makes me that much more grateful for things of warmth: a home, blankets, socks, a hot drink, friends to snuggle with. When I was little, my mom wanted so badly for me to be a "snuggler." She'd make me crawl up on her bed with her for nap-time so she could hug me or make me scratch her arms. I wanted to be an independent brat then so I rarely obliged her and when I did it was out of "have to" circumstances. "SNUGGLE OR YOU CAN'T GO PLAY!" ;) I've always had a great mom...but she certainly has gotten cooler over the years.

Do you ever smell something that brings back memories from years ago? Camp fires, musty books, cedar and pine trees...these remind me of my dad. Our family didn't have a lot of money when I was growing up so instead of flying, we road-tripped for most of our family vacations. We drove to Redlands, California to see my grandparents several times a year. I remember, the final part of the drive was climbing through a forest on one of the mountains. Pine cones would sometimes hit the top of the car and squires would dodge across the road. It always smelled of Christmas with the pine and cedar decorating the slopes. If it was near winter, there would be patches of snow on the tops of trees or in the rock crevices. My dad would get this smile across his face as he rolled down the windows and put his head into the wind. This was home for him.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

College students are an interesting bunch. Young adults all about to begin their "real lives," some single, some starting families. Each one returns to their past for a glance at what has gone before them. Their parents play such a vital role, be that bad or good. Sadly, a great majority look back at broken marriages and families...failed relationships and hurting family members. It's so easy to see the hurt and not beyond.

I have come to grips with the fact that there will be hurt and brokenness in my family's past that will just remain, like a picture framed in someone's house...it just hangs there as something you may see everyday that acts as a reminder for you. But as I look at it and wonder why it's still around, I've realized that healing doesn't come until we can look at those people and situations and see the redeemable elements of them. It's easy for me to pick out flaws in my family, but how little I have sat to think of the good they have taught me...the qualities they have passed on to me.

As we interact with people, I think it's important that we don't judge them for where or what family they've come from, but we should be encouraging them to seek the redeemable things from their past. What is the good of the past if we do not learn from it?

"There's no time for romance...it's football season!"

Moody is famous for it's intermural sports. It's pretty much the only fun outlet most of the Moody men have :) Well it's football season here at MBI and today was the opening day. My boyfriend plays on his floor's A-team (Dryer 2!)

Today was great. First game was at noon...at which time D2 whipped the opposition 30-0. The second game was at 3, also a win at 12-6, but a few more twists...






Jesse was going for the ball just as our friend, James, was also. Pictures speak for themselves. Jesse got knocked out for about 10 seconds and couldn't remember the 10 minutes following. We had a fun 4 hour ER visit tonight :D He was discharged with head trauma and tylenol. Gotta love hospitals :)

What an adventure. We followed that visit with a visit to Portillos for some shakes and french fries :D good stuff.

Face masks and capes...

Perhaps we'll discuss a different type of hero.

Who are 5 people you would consider to be your heroes in this life? (People you have known in your lifetime.) I can name several of my own...

What happens when you realize your hero is also human...has flaws...defects...sins of their own? Do you brace yourself under that pedestal to keep it from toppling over?

I've been processing this concept for the past few months and come to a few conclusions. There have been several people in my acquaintance that I've truly looked up to...worshiped, in a loose use of the term. These people have a great deal of wisdom; they approach life with a solid mind and open heart. But as with anything in the human life, we must be wary of putting to much admiration and emphasis into another person. We're all humans...depraved humans at that.

The cliche, but none-the-less true, fact is that Christ is the true hero. Our hearts long to be in awe and astonishment of someone. Humans will disappoint and fail. Christ endures forever...Christ never fails. "The soul was made to stand in awe of a Person--the only person worthy of awe. All heroes are shadows of Christ. We love to admire their excellence. How much more will we be satisfied by the one Person who conceived all excellence and embodies all skill, all talent, all strength and brilliance and savvy and goodness" (John Piper--Don't Waste Your Life).

I believe it's okay to look up to people...to appreciate the Christ-like qualities in them...but not to the extent that we cannot recognize their humanity and depravity as well.

Thoughts of another

"Dream Deferred"
by Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
and then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crest and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?



"After Great Pain"
by Emily Dickinson

After great pain a formal feeling comes
The nerves sit ceremonious like tombs;
The stiff Heart questions--was it He that bore?
And yesterday--or centuries before?

The feet mechanical
Go round a wooden way
Of ground or air or Ought, regardless grown,
A quartz contentment like a stone.

This is the hour of lead
Remembered if out lived,
As freezing persons recollect the snow--
First chill, then stupor, then letting go.



"The Garden of Love"
by William Blake

I went to the Garden of Love,
And saw what I never had seen:
A Chapel was built in the midst,
Where I used to play on the green.

And the gates of this Chapel were shut,
And "Thou shalt not" writ over the door;
So I turned to the Garden of Love,
That so many sweet flowers bore;

And I saw it filled with graves,
And tombstones where flowers should be;
And priests in black gowns were walking their rounds,
And binding with briars my joys and desires.

Resilient

A young man arrives in Chicago--Midway airport at 1am. He settles himself in a chair and, though exhausted, is so excited about finally coming to the one place nobody thought he could get to. He sleeps for a few hours before bursting awake and taking the first train into the city. Thirty minutes on the El train, and four heavy suitcases later, Chris arrives at Moody ready to settle in and get started. After experiencing a little of SDR's (Student Dining Room) home cookin', he starts the process of signing into residency at school only to reach a dead end. Fine print from acceptance letters is all the sudden bold, 36 type print and staring him in the face.

$2,000 TODAY, $5,000 BY APRIL

There was no way he could afford that and no way the school could or would budge to work it out. At 4:00pm this evening, Chris had to go back to Midway airport and take the last flight home to Sacramento.

Talk about discouragement.

The first time I met Chris was when I picked him up to take him back to the airport. I didn't hate my job until that moment in time when I wished I had a million dollars to pay for his tuition. The 45 minutes back to the airport as we waded through traffic, he told me that he was the first and only Christian currently in his family. No family members supported his decision to study the Bible and prepare for Islamic evangelism and church-planting. He was a strong young man, covering his disappointment with humor, but with exhaustion and sadness written on his forehead nonetheless. By the end of our drive, I wanted to hug him and cry. I can't wait for all of you to meet him in eternity and hear the testimony he shared with me.

Needless to say, I came home with renewed gratitude for the grace on me to be here. God forbid I take this for granted.